project life week 5
overwhelm

lil sister has no personal hygiene

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i'm wondering, is it just her or english bulldogs in general? anyone know? anyone wanna fill me in?

there are some things i just never knew. some things i wish i never knew. and one of them would be the fact that this dog has no personal hygiene or etiquette.

seriously.

i knew they had intestinal issues. meaning: gas problems and not the unleaded kind, either. i'm talkin some serious butt air here. like she can clear out a room, a whole house, a warehouse even!

however, no one mentioned that she would have additional butt issues. those being, it has to be wiped just about every time she poos.

seriously.

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my kid is outta diapers. i really don't relish the thought of wiping anyone else's butt but my own.

and yet, here i am, with natural doggy wipes in hand. gross, i know.

but...it has NEVER been mentioned that lil sister would have issues with her hooha.

seriously!

natural doggy wipes in hand once again, and there i am once again. going when no woman wants to go, believe me. but if i don't...you don't even want to know! believe me.

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on top of the hygiene issues, she has eating disorders. she gulps her food and water. she bloats herself until she can't move. and then wants more. and if i limit her water, she drinks from the pond when she goes out to potty...while i wait with wipes in hand...literally. we've had lots of dogs and not once have we ever had one that eats like this one or drinks like this one. she has no idea when she is full. seriously.

i swear she would drink an entire 5 gallon bucket of water if i put it in front of her. her big bros are not fans. they are used to having their food and water bowls full. all.the.time. now they are learning to eat in shifts. and they no likey.

and it's all her fault.

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and yet, i love her. i really can't imagine our menagerie without her. she's pretty damn cool.

project life is on target, fear not! printed? hahahahahaha

i am grateful:

  • for leftovers
  • for dvr
  • to have all the lawn furniture cushions safely stored for winter
  • for True Blood on my iPad
  • for finding the candlesticks needed for the next DIY

just breathing isn't living!

sincerely,

Trophy wife signature

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