the range

merging traffic

gentle reader, i had quite the experience today on our city's expressway.

i was on my way to pick up my ring and decided the best route would be the interstate to the expressway.

which was great, in theory.

actually, it was great until we had to do the merge thing.

why is it when people see that damn sign, they think they have to race in front of you and cut you off?

how about if you are in the lane to merge, you merge with some modicum of manners, ok?

i was in the correct lane.

asshole was in the lane that needed to merge into mine.

i don't know if things have changed since the last time i read the driver's manual { a hem } but it is my understanding that the lane that has to merge is supposed to merge into traffic when it is safe and possible.

that does not mean running me out of my lane.

so i'm driving along and this douche comes roaring up next to me.

i know what he's going to do.

he's going to keep driving and force me to slow down and let him in ahead of me.

when he should be slowing down and finding his spot to merge into.

let me also declare that there was about 4 car lengths behind me for said asshole to slow down and pull in.

but he must be some sort of alpha asshole that needed to be ahead of me.

let's just say that mercury in retrograde is not going to bode well for said asshole, ok?

so i kept driving.

he kept driving.

i was not going to let him in.

he was not going to slow down.

i am not kidding you when i tell you we were both in my lane.

i was not happy.

it's my lane! he is supposed to merge into my lane. when it's safe to do so.

i have driven this a million times. i'm sure asshole has, too.

i plan ahead.

and yes, there have been times when i have not been able to merge when i wanted to and have had to slow down and almost stop, in order to safely merge into that left lane.

if you live in my city, i'm talking about exiting i-680 from the north, onto west bound expressway.

it's right there on the curve, going onto the expressway.


i do not back down.

mercury is on my side this morning.

once on the expressway, asshole zooms around me, cuts me off and slams on his brakes.

oh not today, mother trucker { that's for you, mom, because you know i did not say trucker! }

so i slowed down and waited for him to get done with his immaturity.

he then pulls into the left lane and blocks me in so i can't get around any of the traffic.

which is no big deal. i'm not in a hurry.

and he paces next me.

so i do the mature thing and flip the mother trucker off.

and i keep flipping him off.

and then i smile and wish him a happier day. while still my middle finger is waving at him.

then when the lanes open up, as i approach my exit, i move to the right two lanes, which pisses off asshole and he roars away.

good day, friend! hope you have a great one.

so when i exit, i am stopped at the light and i hear honking.

and more honking.

so i finally look around.

the older dude in a 1/2 ton diesel pick up truck has his window down so i roll mine down to see what he needs.

he then asks me if i'm ok because he saw the whole thing go down. he tells me that he sees the guy not back down in the merge lane so this guy slows down to make sure everything is ok.

he then tells me that he would have put the asshole into the wall!

he told me that he saw my blond hair and thought to himself, not today, asshole.

see, i'm not the only one that thought the douche was an asshole.

we chatted until the light turned green and then we each went about our day.

as i drove through the intersection, i said, out loud to myself, wow, that just proves to me that there are still nice people in this world.

i have no idea who the asshole was. i was too busy paying attention to my indy like driving that i couldn't take a picture of his license plate. but if you hear someone complaining about a blond in a black srt jeep that wouldn't let his stupid ass merge ahead of me, give me a shout...i'd love to have a face to face chat with this asshole.

i have no idea who the man was that wanted to make sure i was ok. so if you hear a guy talk about this incident on the expressway, give me a shout, i'd really like to thank him again. i appreciate his concern in wanting to know if i was ok.

i think kiroman would like to talk to both men, too.


i am grateful:

  • for my boss driving skills
  • the asshole didn't hit me
  • for the man that wanted to make sure i was ok
  • for getting to spend a bit of time with muscle barbie 
  • for a husband that wants to go kick some asshole's ass hours after the incident

just breathing isn't living!


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